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simply the best

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posted Sunday, 26 August 2012

How good is Dan? He's simply the best.

I've been thinking for a while that if Dan somehow manages to win BB for a second time, I would no doubt grant him the title of the Best to Ever Play the Game. But now I've revised that a bit. Even if he doesn't win, if he pulls off the move he kicked off tonight, I'll grant it to him right then and there.


After Dan comes out of mini-Gitmo and plays sick for a while, they all sit down to dinner. Dan tells them that after dinner he'd like to have a house meeting and just talk, no game stuff, just some things he wants to say so things won't be awkward. He finishes eating and goes off to the bedroom and rehearses a bit. A couple people pop in and each time he asks if everyone's ready (the first few were just getting clothes and stuff). Frank stops in and tells him he really doesn't have to do this. Dan says he knows he's going and he just wants to say goodbye properly and there's never time in that minute on a Thursday.

group group

It doesn't seem to strike anyone as odd that he's doing this before the POV ceremony, but whatever. They all gather in the living room and Britney even passes out tissues. Dan starts out by saying this is his Big Brother Funeral. I think to myself, "are you f'ing kidding me?" Then Dan goes on to say that usually at funerals people say nice things about the "dearly departed" but for the BB funeral he's going to say nice things about everyone else. He also says no one is allowed to cry.

Then he runs down the list:

  • Joe: taught me how to be a better husband and future father, and like I'm a 29 year old "kid", you're a 41 year old "kid" and it's nice to know I never have to grow up.
  • Shane, you're Captain America and after you get out of here you're going to meet a sweet girl, when you least expect it, and I'll even set you up with my sister.
  • Britney: you're the other newlywed, and I know you get how hard it is for me to be away from my wife.
  • Jenn: You're the first lesbian I've ever known, and with all your tattoos and everything, well, I have my prejudices and you've taught me to get past them.
  • Ian: You're a lot like me and I really value the time we've had in the house.
  • Frank: I've said some not nice things about you in the DR, and I'd like to talk to you later in private to apologize.


At this point he jumps in and says, oh, btw, no one is allowed to initiate gametalk with me for the rest of the week. I want you to talk to me just on a personal level, but if anyone talks about game, I'll shout your name and tell you to stop talking game. Just about all of them are sniffling or in tears at this point, including Dan, who'd gotten quite choked up a few times. Personally, I felt like his tears were obviously staged, but they seemed to all be buying it. Jenn perhaps looked a little suspicious.

father dan

And then it's on to Danielle. Everyone's expecting some super sweet sappiness. It starts out with Dan saying how you need one person in this game who is 100% loyal to you. He says he had that in Memphis in BB10, that Memphis would never have intentionally or unintentionally have betrayed him in the game, and that when he first met Danielle he thought she could be that for him this year, but he was wrong. He says "Danielle, you are not loyal, you are no Memphis Garrett. You've betrayed me, you know what you did and we're not going to talk about it. We can be friends outside this house, but you are dead to me in this game."

wtf sniffles

WTF?? Danielle dissolves into tears. Dan tries to hug everyone but gets mostly shunned. Then he tells Frank he wants to talk in HOH and wants to read him something from the Bible. They head upstairs. Dan proceeds to spill everything. He starts by saying he didn't bring the Bible to read from it, but to swear on it, he'll also swear on his wedding ring, his cross from his grandfather, basically everything that means anything to him in life, that everything he's saying is the truth.


He tells Frank about the QP and the POV plan to have Shane or Brit win and then combined with Ian's veto save both Dan/Danielle and force a Joe-eviction. He explains that the "betrayal" was that Danielle didn't throw the POV as she was supposed to and when Dan saw Brit and Danielle whispering he realized he was "alone." He uses this to sell it to Frank that now he knows how Frank has been feeling.


Dan also started out by saying that he knows he has no power, but what he does have is information. He says he's telling Frank all this so that it can be used to benefit him, and maybe if he's so inclined he can take care of Danielle after Dan's gone. After all the cards are out on the table, Frank starts talking about what if Dan stays. Dan says the only way he could stay is if Frank asks Ian to use his veto. Frank says "I wouldn't ask Ian, I'd ask Jenn." I don't believe for half a second that that wasn't Dan's plan since the moment he came out of solitary. But he's so good he just got Frank to be the one to suggest it.


There's a lot of conversation around it, but bottom line is that Frank and Dan shake on a final 2 deal, and also agree on a 4 person alliance with Danielle/Jenn. The whole time they've been talking Danielle's been downstairs in the depths of drama, getting comfort from everyone. Joe pops up to HOH and tells them that she's hyperventilating. So, Dan heads down to try to talk to her. At first she tells him to leave her alone. She eventually does sit down with him in the arcade room and he immediately tells her it was all an act. She's furious and starts hitting him with pillows. He tries to explain that he's just saved both of them in the game. Danielle gets it, but of course she's all about her personal drama. Eventually they reach enough of an understanding that she's okay with the plan, but they're still going to let most of the house think they're at odds.

dan danielle

Everyone except Dan/Danielle heads up to HOH to try to find out what Dan told him. Frank sticks to the story that Dan was just apologizing for being nasty to him in the DR, etc. and says that Dan's promised him his jury vote if Frank makes it to the end. Eventually everyone except Jenn trickled out and Frank had the chance to talk to Jenn. He tells her what Dan told him, and asks her if she'll veto Dan. She's a tiny bit hesitant at first, though not too much because she was already on to Ian. She's been iffy on him for a while, and the other day Danielle actually told her all about the Quack Pack. But as soon as Frank tells her that Dan swore on the Bible, she says done deal. This is again where Dan owns this game. He's been talking to Jenn on a personal level the whole game, and they've had a number of conversations about faith and religion and she knows that Dan would not swear on a Bible unless it was sincere (I will say that I don't believe that Dan technically did swear on anything....but he did offer, and I think he would have actually done it if pressed.)


There are a lot more conversations throughout the evening, and Jenn does have a little bit of hesitation about being responsible for getting a woman voted out. But she's real heated about Ian being a rat and she's got a real passion for getting him out. Since Ian can't go this week with his powerball veto, going after Britney, who is his closest ally at this point, is the next best option. There have been enough conversations and handshakes to make it pretty much a done deal that Jenn will veto Dan, and Frank will repl-nom Britney.


I don't want to jinx it, but I think Dan has actually managed to pull off a move to more than rival Replacement Nomination Roulette.

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